Dating After Divorce: Why Understanding Yourself is the Key to Finding Love
You Don't Need to Understand Men to Find Love
I bet you've heard that you need to understand how men think to get a man to commit to you in the dating world.
That thinking sends you on a wild goose chase of trying to figure out every single guy you meet. You analyze every dating question to ask, overanalyze his texts, and wonder if you're even ready to date after your divorce.
You buy a set of texts to use to catch the guy only to find he wasn't what you wanted after all. Another low-effort man who wasn't worth your time.
And now you're starting over. Again.
The Truth About Dating After Divorce
First, men are not a monolith, so there's really no formula for figuring them out. Those generic dating questions to ask won't give you the answers you need.
Second, you don't need to.
Remember when you were in your prior marriage and you spent all your time reading books, spinning out and trying to figure out your husband? How did that work out?
Unhealthy relationships look like Person A thinking about Person A and Person B thinking about Person A.
This is what the "understand men" philosophy teaches and it doesn't work for dating after divorce. It gets you twisting and turning yourself trying to control someone else's actions.
When Am I Ready to Date? Start With Yourself
Truth is, the only person you need to understand is yourself.
What you want from life
Your vision
Your goals
Your wants and needs
Your preferences
All the things you left behind when you got married the first time
Success in Dating Comes From Authenticity
When you rediscover who you are, it's easy to find the man who matches you.
The one who is looking for YOU right now, but can't find you because the real you isn't showing up. He's not the low-effort man you've been settling for—he's someone who values you for exactly who you are.
When you're changing yourself to match what you're "supposed to be" no one gets to see who you really are. Those dating questions to ask become meaningless if you're not being honest about what you want.
If you know who you are, let your authentic self be seen in the dating world.
If you're not sure you do, some self-discovery work might be in order before deciding when you're ready to date.
Either way, I can help you get there. Dating after divorce doesn't have to be a minefield—it can be the beginning of the most authentic relationship you've ever had.