How to Successfully Navigate Dating After Divorce
Are you finding that your dating app queue is showing all the wrong types of men? Too far away, not compatible, weird, or even scammers? Don't worry—this happens to everyone. I don't know anyone who's used a dating app who hasn't experienced the same frustrations at some point.
When Dating Apps Feel Overwhelming
While it isn't fun to see these disappointing options, letting them drag you into despair isn't necessary. You don't have to entertain those scary thoughts that can creep in:
Thinking all your chances are gone
Believing you won't ever meet someone special
Feeling it's hopeless and you'll be alone forever
Worrying no one will love the real you
I know these thoughts feel true when you're in the middle of dating frustration. But they're just your brain's default thinking pattern when you haven't reached your goal YET.
Are You Ready to Date Again?
When you haven't met your relationship goal, your uncoached brain typically jumps to the conclusion that it will NEVER happen—like a child repeatedly asking, "Are we there yet?" on a road trip. Just because you haven't found the right person yet doesn't mean you won't achieve your goal. You could meet someone TODAY!
Letting these negative thoughts run wild creates a high-pressure, desperate attitude that eventually spirals into despair. This emotional rollercoaster affects how you engage with dating:
It shows in how you communicate with men
It influences how you talk about yourself
It dampens your creativity and enthusiasm for life
It changes how you connect and build relationships
Dating Questions to Ask Yourself
When dating feels frustrating, ask yourself:
How am I showing up in my dating life?
Am I approaching dates with desperation or confidence?
Am I letting temporary setbacks define my entire dating experience?
Have I fallen into tunnel vision, forgetting how big the world is?
Avoiding the Low-Effort Man
Negative thought patterns often make you vulnerable to settling for a low-effort man. When desperation sets in, you might:
Ignore red flags
Accept less than you deserve
Settle for someone who isn't truly compatible
Overlook a lack of effort or investment in the relationship
Transforming Your Dating Experience After Divorce
I want you to know you're not alone. Everyone experiences these challenging thoughts at some level—it's your brain's default mode. Your brain interprets disappointments as reasons to go into fight, flight, or freeze mode, throwing emotional tantrums when it doesn't get its way.
Fortunately, there are tools and techniques to tame these thought patterns so that your emotions support you all the way into the arms of Mr. Right. Through coaching, we can:
Address negative mindsets when they arise
Keep your thoughts on the track of success instead of despair
Develop strategic optimism that sustains your dating journey
Help you understand what to expect at each phase of the dating process
When your mental strength is solid, you can maintain motivation and engagement without becoming overwhelmed by challenges. You'll recognize that each phase has its own characteristics—they're all just stepping stones on your journey.
Working with a coach helps you stay focused on WHY you want a relationship and keeps you fortified for the journey ahead. Weekly coaching maintains your belief, energy, and attitude at 100% while you follow a custom action plan created specifically for your unique situation.
Remember: You can enjoy your amazing life now while working toward the life you want. You're beautiful, capable, and 100% lovable already.