It’s hard to break up with a man that you know is not a fit for you

It’s even harder if he was nice and respectful and you dated for a few weeks or more.

But you have differing beliefs, there was no chemistry

He has a life situation that isn’t workable for you

He was boring or clingy.

You’re ready for it to be over, but you’re also overthinking how to end it.

You’re afraid of hurting his feelings

Worried you’re being judgmental or hypocritical for saying no

And the big one - he paid for the meals and you don’t want to be accused of being a girl who dates for the meals

You don’t think you have a reason justified enough to say “no thanks”

You don’t want to dash his hopes

And you just feel all around guilty for even wanting to.

You spend a lot of time ruminating on what to do and agonizing over exactly how to say it

And when you find the words, you over-explain, trying to justify the breakup

When he disagrees and pokes holes in your reasons, you feel even worse

And decide to stay in the relationship just a bit longer to give it a chance.

By the time it all finally ends, you’re frustrated, confused and angry

You’re stressed out by dating and need another 3 month break.

This approach ruins your experience of the dating process, exhausts and burns you out

Your brain only has so much energy and mind space

Ruminating and delaying a breakup will drain you emotionally

It wastes the time you could have spent with a man who is a better fit.

Saying “no thanks” is a built-in feature of the dating process

Someone will say it to you, and you will say it to others

If you’re not saying no, you’re doing it wrong.

So let’s resolve the excessive guilt.

Excessive guilt is when a person chronically feels intense guilt even when they have done nothing wrong

And it’s terribly common with women - we just don’t realize it isn’t normal

It’s related to anxiety, people pleasing, adverse childhood experiences or a toxic relationship where you were forced to be over-responsible for everything that happened

You have a never-ending supply of guilt and use it as the automatic response to relationship conflict.

This keeps you in cycles of stressful relationships

And I can help you break it.

I work with my clients can work through the emotional recovery needed to release chronic guilt

I help you create a deep awareness of this pattern and get you control over the response

We work on processing and releasing the backpack of guilt you’re carrying around

This alone will create such a feeling of freedom that you will start to enjoy life again.

Then we break the anxious habit of taking on other people’s feelings and feeling over-responsible for them

You’ll stop feeling obligated to diminish yourself and your goals to make others happy

Your mental energy will be freed up to have fun while dating and logically evaluate the men you meet

You’ll be able to see their behavior patterns clearly because your mind isn’t distracted by guilt

You’ll become gracefully assertive

Your brain will have the space to focus on your intuition and your list of requirements

You’ll say no kindly, firmly and finally

So you make the right choice for your new marriage

Which is the whole reason for dating in the first place.

If excessive guilt is having an impact on your dating experience, schedule a consult call to work with me: http://sadecurry.com/schedule-appointment