I used to drag things on with men who weren’t right for me when I dated.

If he put in a lot of effort, I would ignore the fact that he wasn’t what I was truly looking for

There were a few like that, nice guys but not on the same wavelength as I was, and they didn’t show up to life the way I did  

One was super-smart and a sharp dresser

He would write letters, gave gifts, basically pursued me

He bought me books - my Achilles heel

When our differences showed up, he would declare how ready he was to be the man I wanted

Nothing changed, but I had a hard time saying no because of all the apparent effort he had gone through to reassure me

I kept going on one more date, hoping to see a sign that he was the one and my journey could be over

I felt obligated and guilty and that kept me from truly seeing the red flags

The subtle put downs and hints that he intended to change me

The temper

The fractured relationships everywhere

He wanted to nail things down and I had FOMO because there didn’t seem to be super-smart guys in large supply

I kept second guessing myself because I was afraid of making the wrong decision and I believed there weren’t a lot of good guys out there

It didn’t seem fair to him to say no after he’d done more that all the other men I’d met so far

As I dragged things along, my brain adjusted to the idea of being with him, he became familiar and the problems minimized as I focused on what I liked

It turned out to be a toxic relationship that ended disastrously

I had to change this relationship pattern so that I could create a healthy committed relationship

It was exhausting to invest so much of myself into a relationship only to have it not work out

When I dated again, I created a step by step journey that I stuck with to give me the space to figure out if a man was right for me 

I didn’t skip any steps even when my brain was ready to jump forward

I immersed myself in understanding what healthy relationships looked like from the inside out

I had a funnel framework for the first four times I made contact with a person

I figured what to look for at every stage of the journey (red flags don’t always show up on the first or even 3rd date)

And I moved each relationship through predefined  gates and milestones to answer every question I would ever have about whether this was the right person for me

I learned to observe deliberately and slowly without the anxiety that I would lose the relationship

I learned the dance of truly happy committed relationships

This process that I know and take my clients through takes the mystery out of dating and choosing a new partner

And it keeps you moving forward with ease until you meet the one - no more emotional roller coasters from giddy anticipation to despair

You’ll have solid proof that you can and will meet someone

You’ll enjoy yourself along the way

This dating process is like nothing else you’ll find out there

Schedule a consultation call with me to decide if my dating process is the right fit for you.