How I Got Ghosted: Dating After Divorce Success Story
There was this time I got ghosted when dating after my divorce.
I got pretty attached to someone after our first date. He then ghosted me the same week.
At first I was devastated. Then I realized, "I don't even know this man. What am I spinning in despair about?"
So I changed my dating process to hold space for the ambiguity of not knowing who a man is until I got to the truth. This shift was crucial in determining when I was truly ready to date again.
I learned to become unattached to any particular man being "the one" until my standards and milestones had been met. I started asking meaningful dating questions to protect myself from low-effort men who weren't serious about relationships.
I stopped falling in love until a man was 100% proven. Falling in love was in my control, it wasn't something that "just happened" to me.
I let men self-select themselves out of my life by showing up authentically, asking for what I wanted and enjoying myself while doing it. The key dating questions I asked revealed whether they were willing to put in the effort required for a mature relationship.
Guess what happened?
I stopped getting ghosted.
Dating became fun again.
Now I was the one telling the guys that they weren't for me. I recognized the signs of low-effort men early on and didn't waste my time.
I got to pick and choose until "The One" came along.
My clients get good at doing this too. Many divorced women over 40 wonder, "When am I ready to date again?" The answer comes when you've built these emotional skills.
It takes the emotional pain and exhaustion out of dating after divorce.
And accelerates your journey to meeting "The One" in the American dating landscape, where authentic connections are still possible when you know what to look for.