My Dating Failures: How I Found Love After Divorce
I never expected that my husband would live 30 minutes away from me. Back in early 2018, it seemed like I could not find any good men in my city. Dating after divorce felt like an endless cycle of disappointment:
I kept getting to the bottom of my online dating queue
The ones who liked me were not what I wanted
The ones I liked didn't like me back
I wondered if my ethnicity was the issue, or if I was intimidating because I was successful and had my own opinions. The dating questions that constantly ran through my mind were exhausting: "Am I doing something wrong?" and "When am I really ready to date seriously?"
The men I met in person were decent, but emotionally unavailable. I dated a couple of unsuitable men, one of whom wasted my time for months before I figured out the relationship was going nowhere. I was sick of the swiping, confusion, and negging (it's a dating thing - google it). Every low-effort man who appeared in my matches only reinforced my frustration.
The Turning Point in My Dating Journey
It wasn't until I changed my thinking that I stopped feeling stressed and crushed about dating. As I did the inner work, I shifted to the belief that I was fully lovable and love was 100% possible for me.
It sounded like: "I'm pretty sure my husband isn't in this city, and I might have to move to find him. But I'm going to keep practicing and having fun, and wherever he is on the planet, I am for sure the woman who will find him."
When I embraced the certainty that there was someone out there for me AND I was fully capable of meeting him, it completely changed the game. This mindset shift transformed my entire dating after divorce experience.
What Changed When I Finally Felt Ready to Date
I stopped...
Being ashamed of being divorced and "on the market"
Getting frustrated at the dating apps
Worrying about when it would happen
Wondering if I was sabotaging my journey
Chasing the perfect profiles
Using the profiles I didn't like as evidence that something was wrong
Being attached to the outcome of every date
I started...
Dating and interacting with men just as fellow humans
Actively spending time discovering myself and enjoying the life I had
Traveling more and meeting people wherever I went
Putting my true accomplishments, opinions and values out there on dates
The Result? Love Found Me
And less than 2 months later, I met my husband Right there in my city Totally compatible Completely trustworthy and transparent All in on a long-term relationship
Dating Can Be Like This For You Too
When you coach with me, I teach you all the steps I took to meet my partner combined with powerful coaching tools to heal your old relationship triggers and patterns. I'll help you shift your mindset to one of powerful confidence and teach you the essential dating questions to ask both yourself and potential partners.
After doing this work with so many divorced women over 40 for four years, I can help you with your unique dating scenario. I'll show you how to spot a low-effort man early, how to know when you're truly ready to date again, and how to approach dating after divorce with confidence rather than fear.
Your journey to finding love doesn't have to be filled with disappointment. With the right guidance, you can navigate dating successfully and find the loving partnership you deserve.