A secret that will transform your dating results

1st thing — I’ve opened my calendar for 30-minute consultation calls to join Extraordinarily Divorced and the Dating After Divorce Academy. Click here to schedule your spot.

2nd thing — What picture comes to mind when you think about your future relationship?

What picture comes to your mind when I ask that question?

Is it loving and glorious, accompanied by feelings of anticipation and certainty?

Or is the picture unclear or nonexistent? Distorted and negative?

Painted with worry that you will re-create your past relationships again?

What you see most clearly and frequently in your mind’s eye is what you create in your life.

This is why people’s lives mostly stay the same:

We recreate what we see and experience over and over until we have a different vision, strong enough to overcome the current one.

Somewhere on the time-space continuum, your future self is experiencing a relationship (or lack thereof).

The relationship she experiences depends on what you do now which depends on the vision you carry today.

If the vision is as clear as that vacation that you’ve researched and booked, odds are your future self will have exactly that.

The anticipation of that vision will motivate to you do what you need to make it happen.

The certainty will create the commitment that keeps you going until you get it.

If what you see is clear and uncertain, odds are you will be ambivalent about dating.

You’ll dabble and lurk on the apps, date inconsistently and not make the shifts required to create something real.

And if the vision is full of fears of recreating past toxic relationships, you’ll recreate exactly that over and over because that’s what your brain is primed to look for.

Your brain mounts resistance to expending the energy if the result will not be worth it, or worse awful.

Tempting you to settle for easy relationships that don’t work out.

The cure is a solid belief in the future you want.

To make dating decisions knowing 100% you will walk through life with a partner who gets you and wants to commit to you.

Take some time today to sit with that vision of your future self.

What is she telling you to do to create the future you want?