Divorce and Breaking Chains of Societal Expectations with Life Coach Brig Johnson
Have you ever felt like you were living a life that wasn't yours? Like you were just going through the motions, trying to please everyone else but yourself? My friend and fellow life coach, Brig Johnson, knows that feeling all too well. In this powerful conversation, Brig shares her inspiring journey of finding her true self in the midst of a crumbling marriage and forging a new identity that led her to become a multiple six-figure life coach.
We dive deep into the mental load that women carry, making it difficult for them to pursue their dreams and achieve greatness. Brig opens up about her experience with societal expectations and how she bravely embraced her spontaneous nature to overcome these obstacles. From people-pleasing wife to unstoppable force, Brigg's transformation is nothing short of awe-inspiring.
Join us as we explore the power of self-coaching and how it played a pivotal role in Brig's journey to rewrite her story. Find out how taking ownership of her life and letting go of perfectionism set her free and empowered her to make the changes she needed. This conversation is a testament to the importance of fighting for yourself and staying determined in your pursuits. Don't miss this incredible episode!
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Brig Johnson
Brig Johnson helps HIGH ACHIEVING WOMEN BECOME UN-F*CKWITHABLE! Coming from a background as an Advanced Practice health care provider, Brig has built a successful 6-figure life business. Her brash, direct style helps clients see themselves with clarity, her compassion keeps them coming back. Her business motto is “better business through sufficiency.” The more we accept and connect with ourselves, the better we connect with our clients and customers and their dreams.
Choosing a Man Who Fits Your Social Life
Have you ever noticed how challenging it can be to find a partner who truly complements your lifestyle, especially when juggling work and social commitments? My personal experience with this overlooked aspect of dating led me to explore the importance of considering factors like career, business, brand, and professional sphere of influence when searching for a life partner.
Join me in this episode as I discuss customizing your dating journey to find someone who fits seamlessly into your social circle. Learn how to assess potential partners in different social settings and create opportunities to meet people who share your interests. From introducing potential partners to your friends and family to attending events together, discover how to gauge their compatibility with your social life. And remember, even if you don't find the perfect match, you always have the option to change your mind and end the relationship. Tune in for valuable insights and tips on finding a partner who truly enhances your social life.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Dating As a Goal and How to Take Action with Sarah Arnold-Hall
What if you could take control of your dating life and create opportunities for finding love? Join us in this eye-opening conversation with Sarah Arnold Hall, a high-performance coach from Wellington, New Zealand. Sarah shares her incredible journey of dating after deciding she wanted a romantic relationship where she felt safe, loved, and cherished. We discuss how taking action and believing in yourself can lead to finding the right partner, rather than leaving matters to chance.
Together, we dive into the challenges of dating and identify the five main emotions that often hold us back: confusion, overwhelm, self-doubt, fear, and apathy. Sarah shares her strategies for managing these emotions and emphasizes the importance of planning and setting expectations in our dating lives. We also explore the impact of identity on dating, particularly for women, and discuss how our beliefs shape our reality.
Our conversation takes us through Sarah's experience of entering the dating world in midlife and the surprises she encountered along the way. We discuss societal expectations, rejection, and the importance of staying open to life's surprises. This episode is a treasure trove of valuable insights and advice on dating, overcoming obstacles, and navigating expectations. So, tune in and get ready to transform your dating life!
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Sarah Arnold-Hall
Sarah Arnold-Hall is a High Performance Coach who helps people overcome procrastination and take action on their biggest goals. She currently lives in Wellington, New Zealand.
How to Know When He's the One
Making decisions in dating after divorce can be incredibly challenging, especially when it comes to figuring out if the person you're seeing is the right one for you. In this episode, I share my insights on how to navigate these tough decisions and recognize the signs that it's time to let go of a relationship that isn't working. Listen in as I discuss how not all nice guys are a match for you, and why a 60-70% match might not be enough to make a relationship work. I also share my personal experiences with making the wrong decisions and how difficult it can be to let go of the nice guys.
Overcoming indecision in dating relationships is crucial, and in this episode, I explore the difference between evaluating a relationship and overthinking it. I share tips on how to give yourself permission to ask for what you truly want and recognize the difference between FOMO and the gap in what you want. I also discuss tools to help you get to the absolute truth about the person you're considering and yourself, and how to release scarcity in order to make good decisions.
To make the right decisions in dating after divorce, it's essential to have a clear vision of what you want in a relationship. I discuss the importance of self-discovery, creating a relationship vision, and evaluating potential partners. Hear how my clients learn to take out their list when they go on a date and evaluate what they've been able to establish that the partner has and what they haven't been able to establish. I also touch on freeing yourself from the guilt of feeling responsible for someone else's feelings and the importance of giving yourself permission to ask for what you truly want.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Owning Your Pleasure after Divorce with Amber Taylor
What if prioritizing pleasure could revolutionize your life after a divorce? On this episode of the podcast, I had a fascinating conversation with Amber Taylor, a fellow coach and pleasure priority expert who shared her personal journey of healing after her divorce. Amber revealed how focusing on pleasure and joy transformed her world, and how she now helps others do the same through her coaching.
We discussed the connection between processing trauma and the joy and passions we experience in our lives, along with the importance of play, experimentation, and focusing on our own pleasure in healing from past traumas. Amber also touched on the significance of questioning the beliefs we were taught as children and learning to make new decisions as adults.
Amber shared insights on how her clients benefit from understanding their own autonomy, living authentically, and connecting with themselves. We explored her unique approach to helping clients learn to take ownership of their lives and expand their window of tolerance, allowing them to experience both highs and lows without being overwhelmed. This conversation is a must-listen for anyone seeking to prioritize pleasure and create a more fulfilling life after divorce.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Amber Taylor
Amber is an adventurer, podcast host, and expert coach that helps people clear out the muck so they can spend more time enjoying the life they create. Fixing her clients' pleasure and authenticity as the North star, she combines mindset and somatic tools and her own special magic to help her clients revolutionize their worlds by orienting to pleasure!
Dating after Divorce for Fiercely Independent Women with Dr. Stephanie Byerly
In this fascinating episode, I had the pleasure of chatting with Dr. Stephanie Byerly, a Trauma-informed Professional Coach, Obstetrical Anesthesiologist, and Certified Life Professional Coach. Stephanie bravely shared her personal journey through marriage, divorce, and finding love again, as well as the psychological struggles that come with being a successful, high achieving woman in leadership.
Listen in as we explore the impact of expectations, social norms, and external barriers on our beliefs and decisions, and how our own personal experiences and upbringing can shape our thoughts and expectations. Stephanie's life experiences have led her on a journey of healing and self-discovery, and she shares her passion for helping women understand their brain's motivations and the power of deciding who their authentic selves are. We also tackle the challenges women face when it comes to leadership roles, particularly the backlash that often comes with it, and how vital it is to give women a voice that matters.
Join us in this powerful discussion as Stephanie shares her passion for helping women uncover their authentic selves and embrace their potential. You'll leave inspired by her journey of healing, self-discovery, and her commitment to empowering women in every aspect of their lives. Don't miss this opportunity to learn from her insights and experiences, whether you're navigating the dating world, leadership roles, or your own personal growth.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Dr. Stephanie Byerly
Dr. Stephanie Byerly is an obstetrical anesthesiolgist and is a certified Life, Trauma Informed and Professional Coach and Leadership Consultant.
Dating and Choosing to Own Your Life with Elizabeth Sherman
Have you ever felt like the supporting actress in your own life, putting everyone else's needs before your own? In this episode with Elizabeth Sherman, a master certified health and life coach, we discussed the all-too-common experience of women sacrificing their needs for those around them to avoid feeling guilt, but creating resentment instead. Together, we explored the importance of reconnecting with oneself and asking for what we need, even if it means going against cultural and societal norms.
Our conversation included a discussion on Elizabeth's decision to remain childless and the judgment she faced. We examined the economics of couples who do not have children and the trade-offs they make when deciding whether or not to have them. Finally, we delved into the shame and vulnerability that can come with realizing a marriage is not working and why it is so challenging for women to acknowledge this.
We wrapped up our conversation by exploring Elizabeth's journey of dating, the risks she took in love and relationships, and the importance of knowing oneself both now and in the future when choosing a partner. We talked about taking a different approach to dating to make it a more enjoyable experience and shared a client's inspiring approach to dating. Listen in as Elizabeth shares her story and offers valuable advice on letting go of anxiety and finding meaningful connections.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Elizabeth Sherman
Elizabeth Sherman is a Master Certified Health & Life Coach who helps women in peri/menopause manage her symptoms as well as all of the other stressful demands that seem to accompany this season of life:
the physical changes that menopause and aging produce
the emotional demands that accompany our life changes and family structures
the physiological changes of how our body responds to external stimulus and how we respond to those changes
the mental load that we carry as we change our identity and how we see ourselves in the world
Elizabeth hosts a weekly podcast called Done with Dieting: a podcast for the woman who, in spite of all of these demands, has been socialized to focus on her appearance, selflessly do for others, and in doing so becomes the best supporting actress in the movie of her own life.
Elizabeth is a Chicago native, but now conducts her coaching business as an Expat in Mexico, and meets with her clients through video: focusing on the areas of health: eating, moving, stress and sleep management, body image and how we think about them through a DEI & feminist lens.
Done With Broke: Creating Financial Freedom with Dr. Latifat Akintade
Discover the path to financial liberation for women physicians with our incredible guest, Dr. Latifat Akintade, Money Coach for Badass Women Physicians, host of the Money Fit MD podcast, and bestselling author of Done With Broke.
We discuss the vital role money can play in navigating life after divorce. Many women have deferred to their partners in financial matters, leading to feelings of shame and guilt when they need to take control of their own finances. Dr. Latifat provides valuable insights on how to recover, heal, and rebuild while emphasizing the liberation that comes from leaving a relationship that feels stifling.
Dr. Latifat also shares valuable insights on how to overcome money blocks, cultivate a wealthy mindset, negotiate fearlessly, and advocate for the communities we serve. Listen in and learn how to create a financially liberated and wealthy life on your own terms.
This episode will help you untangle your identity from your finances, silence external noise, and focus on your unique money journey. Learn about the wealth mindset, timeless principles, and the power of embracing imperfection on your path to financial success. So, tune in and start creating a wealthy life on your own terms with Dr. Latifat Akintade.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Latifat Akintade
Dr Latifat is a Gastroenterologist and founder of The Money Coaching school for badass women physicians.
She is also the host of The MoneyFitMD podcast and best selling author of Done with Broke. The woman physician’s guide to more money and less hustle.
She combines her interest in personal finance, her training as a certified life coach and her passion for wellness. She believes every woman can create their wealthy life. Her mission is to equip women with the tools they need to be financially liberated to live well, fully without burning out.
How to Take Control of Your Dating Experience
Are you tired of feeling stuck in your dating journey and ready to take charge of your love life? Join me as I share the importance of taking responsibility for your dating journey and how crafting a strategic approach can lead to better experiences and bring you closer to finding the person you're meant to be with.
I'll walk you through an example of a client who made a single shift in her approach and experienced incredible results, while emphasizing that everyone's blind spots and biases are different. Listen in as I discuss how to craft a productive dating process and the need to troubleshoot your dating journey.
By troubleshooting your dating process, you can overcome challenges, attract the partner you desire, and finally take control of your dating experience. Don't miss my advice on the importance of unconditional self-acceptance and seeking support when necessary - because you are worthy of love and companionship. So, listen in and discover how to take control of your dating experience and move closer to finding the partner you truly desire.
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Dating and the Gifts of Neurodiversity with Dr. Krystal Sodaitis
In this fascinating episode, we're joined by Dr. Krystal Sodaitis, a board-certified pediatrician and expert in coaching physicians with neurodiversity. Dr. Sodaitis shares her own story of being a gifted child and how she came to the work of coaching physicians with neurodiversity. Listen in as we explore the concept of neurodiversity, which embraces the idea that all differences in the brain fall into the spectrum of normal, and how having a high IQ can put people at risk for at-risk behaviors.
We also discuss the struggles of being a gifted individual and the importance of embracing differences, such as having ADHD or being socially anxious, and how to handle anxiety that may arise during and after divorce. Dr. Sodaitis gives insightful advice on how to create self-compassion when it comes to differences and how to navigate relationships, dating, and the challenges that come with neurodiversity.
Lastly, we talk about the gifts that come with various neurodiversities, such as dyslexia, ADHD, and autism, and how to use our higher functioning areas of the brain to help us with the struggles. Tune in to hear Dr. Sodaitis share her expert advice on navigating neurodiversity in relationships, fostering understanding and belief in neurodiverse individuals, and creating supportive environments that allow everyone to bring their true selves to the table. This is an episode you won't want to miss!
"Be Your Own Matchmaker" Dating Course: https://pages.datingafterdivorceacademy.com/offers/Zqa2yQXV
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Dr. Krystal Sodaitis
Dr. Krystal Sodaitis board-certified pediatrician, how transitioned from academic medicine to health plan leadership in 2013 she is currently the Associate Chief Medical Officer for a health plan based out of her home state of Illinois. Krystal has advanced certifications in physician coaching, leadership coaching, and deep dive coaching.
Highly intelligent people are often identified as neurodiverse (formally or through self-discovery/diagnosis) well into adulthood. While the diagnosis may come with some understanding and validation, many still have questions. Unsure where to go with their newfound knowledge that’s where she comes in. Krystal helps neurodiverse docs discover their “what now.” She addresses the guilt, shame, and limiting beliefs that come with a diagnosis of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, learning disorder, autism spectrum disorder or any other disability. Our brains are amazing and Krystal wants us all to embrace the different yet glorious ways our brains work. She helps people harness their gifts, not squelch them.
Taking 100% Responsibility in Divorce, Dating and Relationships with Hailey Thomas
In this captivating episode, I had the pleasure of welcoming the amazing Hailey Thomas to share her unique journey through divorce, co-parenting, and dating after divorce. Hailey opens up about her journey towards taking full responsibility for her life and happiness, which ultimately led her to the decision to end her marriage amicably.
Hailey met her new partner after a couple of months of dating by applying her experience with marketing to the dating scene, being her authentic self on every date and never interpreting rejection as meaning anything about her value.
Hailey shares her insights and personal anecdotes with humor and vulnerability, sharing her thoughts on enmeshment and boundaries in relationships, the importance of knowing what you truly need from a partner and the concept of "monagomish" relationships.
This episode is packed with valuable insights and advice for anyone navigating the complexities of life after divorce. Whether you're considering divorce, in the midst of it, or looking to jump back into the dating scene, Hailey's experiences and wisdom will inspire and empower you to take ownership of your decisions and relationships, ultimately creating the life you want and deserve. Don't miss this heartfelt and enlightening conversation with the incredible Hailey Thomas!
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Hailey Thomas
Hailey Thomas, a dedicated mom, adventurer, and entrepreneur, has accumulated over six years of experience in developing, selling, and delivering information products, done-for-you services, digital courses, and consulting projects, boasting a track record of over $750,000 in total revenue. As the leader of One Year from Now, Hailey offers her expertise through a podcast and consultancy aimed at high-impact entrepreneurs.
Hailey holds a BS in Organizational & Leadership Communication from Illinois State University and is currently credentialing in Interpersonal Neurobiology. In addition to One Year from Now, she manages a small portfolio of businesses. Her accomplishments include launching and then exiting a digital course/membership community that generated $100k in its first 10 months with over 50% profitability, even amidst a global pandemic.
When not working, Hailey enjoys reading fiction, lifting weights, watching 80s horror movies, and entertaining with living room karaoke. As a top business strategist and entrepreneurship coach in her field, Hailey Thomas is well-prepared to help entrepreneurial clients succeed through her life and business coaching subscription service, Auxiliary Brain.
"Dating without Overwhelm" with Michelle Gauthier
“There's no formulas for recovering from divorce”
“ I long ago stopped caring what other people thought about me. It wasn't easy, because I used to really care but now it's like, I just care about me, what I think about myself, and what's best for my kids.”
“But I learned how to just love people for who they are. And the power of doing that starting with myself, instead of thinking of all the ways that I'm lacking or whatever. And so just going into a relationship with that mindset is so different.”
“Some people are so starved for love and kindness and acts of service that…they can be bought with a single cup of coffee.”
“I have always had an underlying belief that there are great guys…like, my dad's a great guy, my brother's a great guy. I just believe that there are great guys available.”
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Michelle Gauthier
Michelle Gauthier is a Life Coach for overwhelmed working women.
Michelle is a single mom of two adopted kids and used to be an overwhelmed, busy working mom herself. She quit her successful 20 year corporate career to become a life coach to help other working women navigate their careers and home lives with ease.
How to Stop Attracting Low-Effort Men
Are you tired of attracting low-effort men in dating and relationships, especially after divorce? It’s important that both partners in a relationship are truly invested in the success of the relationship. Bare minimum actions on the part of either partner are not enough to sustain a relationship
In this episode I share my personal experience with high and low effort men when dating.
You will discover the factors that may increase the likelihood of tolerating low effort relationships, such as societal expectations, gender socialization, childhood emotional neglect, codependency, and love addiction, and learn how to break free from these patterns.
You’ll also learn the significance of being open and exploratory in the dating process, not relying on a rigid checklist or formula to determine compatibility.
Finally you’ll find out how feedback and self-awareness can help you identify and avoid low-effort men, and develop your intuition to make better decisions in the future.
Dating after Divorce Podcast 174-How to Stop Attracting Low-Effort Men
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
Low-effort men, dating after divorce, relationship expectations, emotional neglect, people-pleasing, co-dependency, love addiction, texting strategies, high-effort men, nourishing relationships, intuition training, relationship standards, consultation call, personal growth, commitment-minded.
TRANSCRIPT
Welcome to the Dating After Divorce podcast. I'm your host, Sade Curry, and I believe every divorced woman deserves a romantic relationship where she feels safe, loved and cherished. You can create the most amazing life after divorce, and I will teach you how.
Hey everyone, welcome back to the Dating After Divorce podcast. I am your host, Sade Curry, and today I want to talk about low-effort men. This is a common experience, and many worry about getting stuck with someone who is low-effort. Many clients feel they attract these people, or that these people see something about them and want to be with them.
The answer is yes and no. There are low-effort people in the world, including low-effort women. Due to gender socialization, there seem to be more low-effort men because expectations of men in relationships have been low for centuries. We're currently in the middle of a shift, but just because men have been socialized this way doesn't mean you need to settle for a relationship where someone doesn't show up as you envision.
I've had experiences with low-effort men, and I'll share one of those stories today. Regarding whether you attract them - everyone encounters these men. However, if you grew up with childhood emotional neglect, were in an abusive or neglectful relationship, are a people-pleaser, co-dependent, over-function, or have a high tolerance for not being cared for, these triggers can connect you to these men. Past experiences may make these men feel normal, healthy, and like home. You don't "magnetize" them to you, but when they appear, you tolerate them because you feel comfortable in those relationships.
Another way you "attract" them is through your messaging - how you present yourself in relationships, on dating profiles, and in texting. This sends signals that you might tolerate a lower-effort relationship.
Speaking of texts, if you missed my webinar last Friday (April 28), the replay link is in the show notes. The webinar covers seven texts to connect with active, growth-minded, high-effort, commitment-minded men. This is the texting process I teach clients and used in my own dating relationship. Some texts are word-for-word what I sent to my husband and others I dated. They work, especially when your dating strategy and messaging are dialed in. I explain the psychology behind why this approach works better than much of what you see online.
Back to low-effort men. My husband is high-effort - he invests in our relationship and wants to see it succeed. He's presented this way since we met, always arranging the next date and sending thoughtful invitations. On our third or fourth date, he wrote out a scroll inviting me to an Italian restaurant. He sends me a Snapchat message daily to maintain our streak. I sometimes almost drop the streak but show up in other ways. He's always willing to invest and do the work. We don't always get it right, but because we're both willing to invest, we always find our way.
I did encounter low-effort men. One in particular I dated on and off for months because I didn't recognize the signs at the time. I met him on an app. He was interested, conversational, and asked many questions. This is why I tell people that just because a man asks questions doesn't mean he's right for you. Without being open and exploratory in this process, learning and optimizing your strategy, you can get pigeonholed following a rigid path.
He was great at conversation, phone calls, and showing up for dates, but weeks in, he would go on "business trips" (I'm making air quotes). During these trips, I'd get strange pictures of places he visited - he was never in the pictures. Looking back, it was obvious. Sometimes he couldn't attend dates involving my friends. He always managed to be unavailable for those, yet we had great dates when it was just us. He lived about an hour and 15 minutes away, which sometimes became an excuse not to meet. Looking back, there were numerous signs.
I finally caught on and ended things. After about six months of no contact, he emailed me with the subject "Howdy," saying: "Hey, just wanted to see how things are for you. Hope all is good. I'm sure that it is. You are a bit of a rock star anyway. If you don't feel like replying, that's okay. I just wanted to say hi, Cody." (That's not his real name.)
I used to receive messages like this after his disappearances - affirming and validating. A low-effort man can also build you up, so don't fall for that either. Coming from a background without much validation or acknowledgment of my brilliance, and having been in a marriage where I was put down, this validation felt good. The acknowledgment of how amazing I am was the bait that kept me connected with someone low-effort.
Low-effort men can appear to be making efforts. I've spoken with clients who thought they were in relationships with men who texted them every morning and evening but wouldn't show up in person for weeks.
Tolerating low-effort people is an easy trap. It's not necessarily your fault - it's influenced by socialization and past experiences. If you haven't experienced a truly nourishing relationship, you might not recognize the signs or know the difference.
To tell the difference, first truly absorb what a healthy, nourishing relationship feels like. I give my clients exercises like the "good man scavenger hunt" where we look for glimmers of safety and nourishment. We work on raising their standards in all relationships. You can start raising your standards for how nourished you are in relationships now, whether or not you're dating, to embody what it feels like to be well-cared for by yourself and others.
There's no formula or checklist - it's a dynamic skill. I coach clients based on their specific situations. We examine which relationships show patterns of tolerating neglect and lack of support. Since there's not just one type of low-effort man, we analyze the particular person and situation.
When working with clients, we provide feedback on what's happening moment by moment. We examine: What happened? What were you thinking? What were you feeling? What did he do? This helps identify missed signs. Generally, the first month of working with me establishes the foundation, then clients start meeting men while we optimize their process through these moment-by-moment check-ins. They build understanding of who is good for them and who isn't.
They train their intuition to be savvy and learn to listen to it. They verify their intuitions so they're not being judgmental or making impulsive decisions. We address the challenge of women being conditioned to second-guess themselves, wonder if they're making the right decision, experience FOMO when letting someone go, or worry about being "too picky." We eliminate all that, so clients learn the nuances - like the difference between someone who says you're a rock star versus someone who treats you like one.
You never want to invest weeks or months with these men. When you let them go quickly, it feels like you've stopped attracting them because they're just moving by. Your energy, effort, and attention are spent only on men who truly want commitment, men who are good, men whose company you enjoy, men who show up - so you can choose the one you want.
Spend time thinking about your past experiences. What you tolerate might differ from what another woman tolerates, which is why I don't give a checklist. What have you tolerated? How can you learn from that? How can you shift so it doesn't keep happening? How can you show up differently and think differently to make different decisions when you encounter these situations?
If you want help learning and practicing this to accelerate the process, schedule a consultation call with me. We'll audit your current mindset, activities, and results. If they're not what you want, we'll map out where working with me could help, what changes you could make, or skills you need to develop. You can decide if my program fits you, and I'll give honest feedback about whether it's right for you. I've referred potential clients to other coaches or suggested therapy first when appropriate.
Go to the show notes to download the seven texts workshop and book your consultation call. Spots are available as early as tomorrow (May 2). We can discuss how this work can revolutionize your journey to finding the partner you want.
Thanks for listening today. If you're ready to get married after divorce, download my free eight-video training designed to help divorced women date with ease and get married again. Head over to SadeCurry.com to get started. That's S-A-D-E-C-U-R-R-Y.com. I'll see you inside.
Radical Self-Love and the Energy of Money with Serena Hicks
"I just want everyone listening to know that money is for you and money loves you and money wants to move to you and flow/work through you...money loves you and you're worthy of love, dignity, and respect."
-Serena Hicks
My guest today is Serena Hicks, a money mindset mentor for love-led humans. We explored the relationship between love and money, discussing how “Holy Wow Money" is about radical self-love, radical service to others, and some serious pleasure activism.
Serena tells her money transformation story: how she embraced the importance of self-validation, healing her relationship with money and prioritizing herself, leading her to a 2 million dollar business.
We also talked about the challenges associated with shame and receiving financial support, as well as the importance of being open to receiving support from various sources, including the Divine.
We explored the parallels between creating love and creating money, highlighting the role that societal messaging and fear of disappointment can play in shaping our experiences.
Our conversation touched on the value of human connection, the role it plays in creating a nourishing environment for success, and the concept of love as a catalyst for financial growth.
Join me in this episode to learn more about cultivating a more abundant money mindset, overcoming shame, and finding true love. Serena Hicks is a joy, you don’t want to miss this conversation!
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Serena Hicks
Serena Hicks is a Black biracial Money Mindset Mentor for Love-led humans. Burning bright NOT burning out to have Holy Wow Money™ changes you (and the whole world). She is the creator of the Boom Boom Room (where your beliefs about money and the Patriarchy go...BOOM) and the Holy Wow Money™ Mastermind, where she teaches how Holy Wow Money™ is about radical self-love, radical service to others and some serious pleasure activism. She is here to change the world.
Remarriage, Losing 100 pounds and Making $14 million after Divorce with Corinne Crabtree
“I made the critical decision that day that I was going to change. There was no more trying. There was no more anything. I was just going to figure out how to change.”
“If we intellectually know what we need to do, we just need to go out there and do it while we’re learning how to make taking that action less painful.”
- Corinne Crabtree
This week, my special guest on the Dating After Divorce podcast is Corinne Crabtree.
Corinne grew up poor, without a father figure, struggling with her weight and in a miserable first marriage at age 19. She got divorced and committed to never accepting less than healthy treatment from a partner again. Corinne embarked on a transformative journey and decided to change her mindset, her behaviors, and her life.
She is now a master life coach, mentor, and inspirational figure who has dedicated her life to helping women regain control of their health, finances, and relationships after divorce. After overcoming her own struggles with weight loss and self-esteem, Corinne lost 100 pounds, found love again in her second marriage, and built a $14 million business focused on empowering others. Through her No BS Weight Loss and No BS Businesswoman programs, she has positively impacted the lives of thousands of women, teaching them to break free from societal expectations and create their own paths to success.
In this episode, Corinne shares how to:
◾Transform weight struggles and move forward from divorce using self-care and self-compassion.
◾Brave discomfort and take decisive steps towards any goal
◾Use effective communication, healthy negotiation and compromise in marriage to acknowledge and provide each partner's needs
◾Identify the patterns that have held you back in the past and make a critical decision to commit to change and identify
◾Focus on immediate, achievable steps that you are ready to take in your journey, whether it's weight loss or dating.
Connect with Corinne:
No BS Weightloss Program:
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/losing100podcast/
Instagram - @Corinne_Crabtree
No BS Business Women
Facebook-https://www.facebook.com/NoBSBusinessWomen
Instagram - @NoBSBusinessWomen
Listen and Subscribe to the Losing 100 Pounds Podcast
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/losing-100-pounds-with-corinne/id1233384453
Corinne’s Free Weightloss Course & Website
Corinne’s Advanced Weightloss Coaching Certification
http://theweightlossuniversity.com/
Corinne’s No BS Business Women Membership
https://www.nobsbusinesswomen.com/
Corinne’s No BS Business Bootcamp Event
https://www.phit-n-phat.com/bootcamp-2023/
Connect with Sade Curry:
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
The Generous Prenup with Laurie Israel
My guest on today’s episode is Laurie Israel. Laurie Israel is the author of The Generous Prenup. She is an attorney, consultant, and mediator, concentrating her practice on both prenuptial and postnuptial agreements. Many of my clients have had questions about how to handle finances when remarrying on partnering again after divorce, so I was excited to bring her on the podcast to talk about prenups and how they could be useful.
And for those just considering a divorce, she explained how marital mediation or arbitration may be more effective than divorce court.
Our conversation revealed that what is commonly assumed about prenups and what is talked about in the media and celebrity divorces isn’t the truth at all.
Laurie pulled back the curtain on prenups and laws around money, contribution and shared her views about generosity and its role in relationships. Enjoy the episode!
“What else is marriage, but being considerate to each other?...that's the key to it, really caring about another person.”
“A lot of people are encouraged by the media, and what they’re reading to make money more important, and protecting your money more important than your marriage…that's the problem.”
“There's a lot of pushback on my views by younger people like millennials, and they say…why shouldn't we have a plan for our marriage? You know, why should we take the risk? But the problem is that these people have not experienced what a long term marriage is. And they also don't understand what the laws about marriage and divorce and estates are.”
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Laurie Israel
Laurie Israel is an attorney, consultant, and mediator, concentrating her practice on both prenuptial and postnuptial agreements. She works as a consultant and mediator nationwide. She previously practiced for 35 years in the areas of tax law, divorce, collaborative law, estate planning, probate of estates and trust administration, as well as mediation and, in Massachusetts, providing counsel for couples entering into prenuptial agreements. Laurie is one of the initial practitioners and developers of the field of marital mediation, the practice of using mediation to help couples solve marital problems and improve their marriages. Laurie is a former board member of the Massachusetts Council on Family Mediation and the Massachusetts Collaborative Law Council. Her writings include articles on divorce, mediation, marital mediation, and prenuptial agreements.
Laurie Israel in The Cut (New York Magazine) Why You (Probably) Shouldn’t Get a Prenup (Correction: On the podcast, Sade misnamed the publication as the New York Times instead of the New York Magazine)
When and How to Go Exclusive with a Partner
It's important to take your time to go exclusive and know when and exactly how to make it happen.
Too many women say no too early because they feel guilty that taking their time means stringing a man along.
Or they get pressured into saying yes too early because they don't want to be the bad person and disappoint anyone
This is the stage where you must evaluate whether "your type" is really what you need and is even a healthy relationship at all
Where you decide that you want the healthy blend of good qualities in a man and attraction to a man
So that you can say that "yes" with full confidence
If you're thinking of going exclusive with your partner and need guidance and accountability this episode is for you.
Be sure to get on my mailing list for more details on my upcoming Webinar, THE 7 TEXTS YOU SHOULD BE SENDING FREQUENTLY IF YOU WANT TO MEET A COMMITTED
Click here to join my mailing list
You can also work one on one with me or join the Dating After Divorce Academy
Schedule a Consult Call with me to get details.
Featured on the podcast:
Podcast Episode: Understanding Chemistry and Attraction
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Dating App Texting Anxiety
Today’s Podcast is about Dating App Texting Anxiety
Texting is the playground of the worst dating games and it's why many dating journeys end before they even begin
The myth is that you have to trick a good man into liking you
So you do things in a weird way and overthink what to write
This stage causes so many people to give up because it's exhausting
My overall philosophy is to treat every stage of dating like you would a normal networking event
Texting is like email where you are evaluating a person for basic respect, decency and possible overlap in interests - you can't tell much more than that until a call or two and a first date
It's a new skill that needs to be learned, practiced and adjusted to fit who you are and what you are looking for
In this episode, I break down what you need to make this stage of dating count:
Be willing to be yourself
Be willing to ignore the rules or demands other people make
Be willing to make mistakes
Be willing to let other people do the wrong thing without taking it personally or sticking around to experience more of it.
If you overthink or have anxiety when you text someone you're dating, this is the episode for you
And if you want to get more help with texting, I have a full masterclass on Texting coming soon
THE 7 TEXTS YOU SHOULD BE SENDING FREQUENTLY IF YOU WANT TO MEET A COMMITTED
Get on My Email list for info: Click here
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Troubleshoot Your Dating Profile
Today's episode is special!
This episode is one of the live videos for the 10 DATES IN 30 DAYS CHALLENGE currently going on in the Dating After Divorce Academy.
Here are some of my best tips on troubleshooting your dating profile.
This episode will help you to better understand how to improve your dating profile.
These tips will help you to get better results in your dating journey.
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Dating for High-Achieving Women with Sonya Green
“I had changed my mind about children…I was trying to fill a hole… And so I thought, you know, that maybe they would help to fill that. And nothing was going to fill that, right? I didn't even know what the hole was.”
“It was messy. It was awful. It was so off script for me. But I think it was the catalyst I needed to understand so many of the processes and thoughts and ways that I had been taught.”
“I'm gonna say something really crazy, culturally…there's not just one person in the world for you.”
“...Having your list and knowing your values is so important, because there are multiple people who you could meet and…have a really important relationship with.”
If you want to start making serious progress in your dating journey TODAY, sign up for a coaching consultation call.
Get my FREE PDF Download: 50 Green Flags of a Healthy Relationship
Featured on the Show: Sonya Green.
Sonya has taught college-level professional and technical writing for the past 30 years in universities across the east coast and southern US. She retired from academia in July 2022 and now works full time in her coaching practice. She is currently teaching a course on Dropping Imposter Syndrome to high-achieving business women in addition to her 1:1 coaching practice.
When she's not working, Sonya loves to spend time with her husband on their farm or with their Brady-bunch of 6 children (and 2 granddaughters!).